My divorce opened my eyes to the need for people to have good and bad in their lives. My ex went to great pains to construct me as the bad guy in our relationship, which I have come to understand was just a strategy to ease her decision to end our marriage. Recognizing this made it much easier for me to move on, but the specter of good and evil persists. My girlfriend at the time, for example, hated my ex despite never meeting her. Perhaps her construction of my ex was merely an expression of love through solidarity with me, but I’m not entirely convinced that tells the whole story. Continue reading Good Guys and Bad Guys in Divorce
In the beginning I fought for our marriage. I was convinced that our relationship defined me, and that without it life was not really worth living. Of course, the only close relationships that I had maintained in my life to that point were with my ex, son, and her mother, who was living with us at the time. I had severed myself from my family, both geographically and relationally, and I was further isolated through my recent move to Quebec where I was experiencing culture and linguistic shock. Continue reading Divorce and Control
When she told me, I knew it was over. While I was given to dramatics and idle threats, she was always the one shocked into submission by the possible implosion of our relationship. However, my manipulations were rendered impotent before the quiet resolve of her simple statement, “I want a divorce,” which would need to be respected, eventually. Continue reading Declaration of Divorce
There are few place in Montreal that are a better example of a bike-path that causes everyone to question the priorities of the government. The intersection of de Maisonneuve and Decarie is a problem by its design, which is forgivable because it was constructed before the rise of bike culture here, but the current state of the intersection is somewhat unforgivable, showing that the present municipal government either doesn’t care or lacks the vision and intelligence to implement a true solution to the problem. Continue reading Danger Zone Decarie
You ever really think about the place of the taxi in the public transportation cocktail? That’s what they call it here, a cocktail, and they include taxis in it along side buses, bike-share, and car-share.
Being part of the cocktail implies that the service somehow contributes to the public good and is an environmentally friendly option to taking your car. But really, there’s no difference between taking your car and a taxi when it comes to the environment, and it’s even possible that taxis are worse.
I think they might have been drinking when they lumped taxis with real public transportation alternatives because the more I think about it the more this cocktail starts to taste like a bacon martini.